Figures...

So, I finished my essay and turned it in (via email). I was definitely proud of myself... even though I wanted it done by the end of July, early August isn't that bad.

Well... I emailed it and instantly received an response. My coordinator is out of the office until the 14th!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAhahahahaahAHAHAHAHA

::pants, catches breath::

Got. To. Love. That. Irony.

Here I was all worried I was getting it in too late. Well... screw that, I'm going to play some Ratchet and Clank now. Pffft.

::sigh::

What am I doing writing this blog instead of finishing my essay?

What am I doing instead of getting rid of this plight called school?

I. Am. Procrastinating.


I hate school. It's not even that hard, but I still hate it.

Find a Happy Place

Think of home. Your real home.

Think of comforting futures. Think of diligence, decency, respect.

Sit still for a moment. Close your eyes and take a long deep breath.

Open your eyes. You can still see.

Understand that it will work out for the best. It always does when you keep your head held high. Keep your thoughts half full. Keep the negative in perspective and don't let it overwhelm your senses.

You can see. You can hear. You can taste and smell. Most of all- you can feel.

Feel the wave of change starting slow at first, then building as it gets closer to your shore, and when it breaks you will be ready. You will hold strong against the crash upon your chest. You will not fall.

You will stand.

Take a deep breath.

You will stand.

The End of the World for my Two Year Old

Sibby, Trevor's beloved stuffed dog, lost his mouth string today. It's been dangling off for about 4 months now- and I am surprised it took this long.

I put T down for his nap like usual, and an hour later I heard him yell something and start crying (quite out of the ordinary). I went into the room and there he was, tears filling his eyes, saying, "Sibby mouth trash, Sibby mouth trash throw away...".

He was truly very upset that Sibby had lost his mouth and was devastated by having to throw the string away. I tried my best to comfort him, but the tears kept coming, and he kept saying, "Sibby mouth, Sibby mouth...".

It was sad for me, I didn't know what to do! I tried to explain how we could give him a new mouth when we got home, and how Sibby isn't in pain, but it just seemed to make things worse. I know he will get over it, and right now he is sleeping peacefully in the room- no doubt holding his Sibby as close as he can.

He cares so much. It's awesome.

Little Memory Game

Let's be honest- maybe two people will respond, but it's worth a try anyway.

1. As a comment on this post, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn't matter if you know me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It's actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I'll assume you're playing the game and I'll come to your blog and leave one about you (if you have a blog, that is... if not- I will track down a way to make you laugh... i.e. leave a memory).

Freewrite- Stress Release

Cutting hair wanting
Cutting people from life
Sick sick sick of bullshit
Sick of place

Fingernails painted bloody messed up
Decency not a part of diction
Not a part of life
Living in Fiction
Like a different world

World of scum
World below
Not caring, harping
Negative

Nonsense of course
To minds outside mine
Except if your loved
Trusted
Kind

Then you know
What feels and grows
Like daggers
Within owned heart
Within owned soul
Hatred not sparked
By nothing at all

Sometimes.

I definitely feel awkward and stupid.

I want to go home so bad. So much for new friends, I guess. Why is it I always try to have fun and be myself but it never works? Ever?

I miss you Mrs. Wilde!! I can't wait to see my best friend again!!

::sigh::

So much for trying.