Testing... testing... I am sending this directly to my blog, via text message. Once again technology wins. So, hello readers... thanks for stopping by. :)

Bits and Peaces (hehe)

Stress, as defined by yours truly, is any negative emotion.

Fascinating. Any negative emotion? What does that mean....?

fear, anger, sadness, frustration, loneliness, judgment, regret, loss, etc.

I fully believe there are only two ways to feel: Good & Bad.

You have the choice to feel good. It IS a choice. Life is hard, life throws a bunch of shit at you, but it is still life! There is so much beauty in this world, and it becomes easier to see once you can switch gears.

I am not oblivious. I know there are things that hurt, and I do suffer, but I will always turn it around and look on the bright side. Why?

Why not.

It feels good to feel good.
It feels bad to feel bad.

(wow, brilliant)

Point: Either feel bad or good.

Better point: Feel Good. Don't dwell. Look past. Let go. Forgive. Accept. Be at Peace.

(small side note: I feel really good when I spell check on my entry and the little green words, "no misspellings found" pop up. It's the little things, ya know?)

One must settle their mind before they can master their heart.

One must be still.

One must scream from time to time.

One must seek shelter in the middle of a storm.

One must let go.

One must accept.

One must understand everything will be OK.

One must be level headed.

One must be still.

(A little mantra before I lose my mind. It's been a pretty heavy few days... and taking a lot of effort not to completely lose it. Have you ever sat on the edge of your bed, staring at the negative space between the fibers in your carpet, perfectly still and thinking of absolutely nothing? Have you ever been an empty shell, devoid of everything? Have you ever felt as though your soul no longer resides in your body and it's pretty much not worth moving at all?)

Vince-ism

We feed our dogs every night at 7:30pm. When it's getting close to "that time" my dog, Vince, will sit very diligently and stare at me. Just stare. And sit.

If we happen to be in our bedroom, and I notice him staring at me, I'll glance at the clock to double check the time, naturally.

Tonight, since daylight savings happened, my dog started staring at me around 6:15pm. Though, this time instead of simply staring at me he would glance at the clock, then look at me, then at the clock, then at the closet door that his food waits behind.

I told him it wasn't 7:30 yet, and he would have to wait.

He licked his chops, looked at the clock, and back at me as if to say, "Hey Mom, c'mon... seriously? It's dinner time. You and I both know this fact. So make with the food already woman."

Sometimes this dog is too funny for words. He looked at the clock like he could tell the time, and that made me chuckle. Thought I'd share.

Blurp

Do you ever find you have these amazing thoughts, ideas, views, or stories run through your mind and once you sit down to write them they vanish?

Why is that?

Does the universe (or God, or our subconscious, or however one may believe) want us to keep these things to ourselves? Or is it just bad memory?

Maybe I should walk around with a tape recorder in my pocket. Oh, and by tape recorder I mean little piece of plastic with a button and red light on it, that holds up to 18 hours of recorded digital sound, available in pink, black, or dark blue...

Oh technology.

It's That Time Again....

Thankful A-Thursday...

(iamthankfulfor)
the office, language, homemade cookies, peanut butter, and vanilla ice cream.

seeing, hearing, tasting, smelling, and touching.

funny quotes

good coffee

a really really good dog

shaded trails, with fall colors and a running streams- tucked neatly amidst beautiful little houses

cuddly mornings
cuddly evenings
kisses whenever I want them
kisses whenever he wants them

a son who LOVES the snow, the color green, and heavy metal music

life.
love.
living a life full of love.

Misunderstandings and the meaning of life

Alright. Let's face it. Life isn't fair, life is hard, and life takes work. Happiness takes work.

Growing into "who I am" has been an enlightening, darkening, scary, freeing, exciting, confusing, frustrating, fascinating, and any assorted descriptive word along those lines- kind of experience.

It is for everyone. At least, for everyone who is trying to be the real them.

Though, as I read that last line I have to admit- it sounds silly. We are who we are. Even on our journey to "discovering" ourselves, we are being... ourselves. Just in a different stage of our life. Right?

To quote one of my favorite "thinker" movies, I Heart Huckabees, I have to ask:

"How can I not be me?"

So as I assess myself, at this very moment, to every microscopic molecule- I feel the need to express my current state of being. How? In a list. Aren't lists great? I love them.

1. I try, try, try to think positive thoughts about everyone. Everyone! (and everything!)

2. Instead of saying "hate" I say "severely dislike" or something similar.

3. It's easy to think negatively about people or situations, and sometimes I am lazy and don't want to think positive... it can be hard!

4. I have a very dry sense of humor, and sometimes I severely dislike when people take my comments to heart. When I meet someone new I stay relatively "normal" with my humor, but once I get to know them I take it a step further. I never mean anything harsh, but people often don't like having the truth pointed out to them blatantly and (usually) loud enough for others to hear. The truth can hurt for people who live with doubt and insecurity.

5. I'm in love, totally.

6. I make a very, very conscious effort not to judge people. It goes hand in hand with being positive. If you're positive, life IS better.

7. I go off on tangents when I talk.... or write.

8. My memory and observations skills have amazingly increased over the last few years. Is it maturing? Standard growth patterns? Personal enlightenment? The result of conscious effort? Better diet?

9. Speaking of better diet- It continues to surprise me when foods I used to love don't even register on my delicious-dar now. Like... meat. I just don't crave it. I don't want it, don't like how I feel after I eat it... Also like soda. Don't want it. Pretty much the only thing I ingest that is "bad" for me is Red Bull. Boy, is it bad for me. I feel like it's the only thing I crave. Yes, I was addicted.

10. I have no fears. Not an easily accomplished goal. I do experience the occasional worry that could be misunderstood (if dwelled on) as fear, but when it comes down to it- Death (in any shape or form), Poverty, Loss, Spiders, Elevators, Loneliness, Germs, etc are not avoidable. Whether I choose to feel negatively or positively about these things is up to me. Only me. Everyone has control over their own thoughts, and thoughts become things. So, if I can positively think of death (which used to be my biggest fear) I can openly accept life as it is. Why fight it when you can enjoy the ride?

11. I believe, undoubtedly, in love.

12. I believe, undoubtedly, in myself.

13. I believe, undoubtedly, in the power of positive thinking.

14. Getting a compliment on my writing can change a bad day to a good one... especially when it's completely unexpected. My writing is one of my most cherished gifts. I have a journal from 2nd grade that my teacher wrote in (while doing grades). She wrote that I am very good at putting my thoughts on paper. As an 8 year old I was convinced: I must KEEP writing.

15. I have many "soul mates". People whom I strongly believe I have known longer than 27 years. A few of you know who you are, and I LOVE YOU! :)

16. I'm going to be 28 this year. I feel so young. I feel like life is endless and there is no limit to what I can accomplish. Life is a giant to-do (fun stuff) list.

17. The last two years have been the BEST of my life so far.

18. I have experienced the feeling of enlightenment... I am really looking forward to feeling it again. (Duh.)

19. My Mom, Elizabeth Marie, was one of the most incredible women on this planet... and I'm not just saying that. It's true. I have a good idea of when she is with me, but I still haven't seen her- and I wait patiently for the day that she shows herself to me (and not in a dream), so I can see her smile again right in front of me. The woman is unforgettable :). She touched many lives, and on occasion I feel remorse for not knowing more of her. There are so many questions I have- and now with Grandma Marge gone, too... I will mortally know the maternal side of my family through a child's eyes.

20. Everyone has different coping mechanisms. I get that.

21. If you're still reading these, I can't tell you enough how much I appreciate it. Well, yes I can, I'm a writer! I can put whatever I think into words. It's a gift. So- readers, followers, guests, passer-by, friends, family, strangers, lover: Thank you for spending time with me. You are loved and appreciated.

Cheers,

Vi