Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Dirty Words

Apologies for the lame entries as of late.

If it wasn't obvious, allow me to clarify: Life sucks right now.

It happens. We all go through periods, phases, stages, whatevers... You know, times in life that you feel regret and anger more than any other emotion.

Dirty days that make us say dirty things and think even more filthy.

Catch my drift?

Generally the positive vibe of my entries is meant to uplift and inspire. The last couple have been sort of like freewrites which means the negative emotional imbalances happening end up spilled to the world, and to you- my beloved readers.

Oi vey, I'm sorry about that. Thanks for stopping by you guys, I always appreciate a bit of feedback... And definitely thank you for sticking around even though most of my posts have no point whatsoever.

Oh! I almost forgot to mention that I don't have internet at home yet, and have been accessing Blogger through my phone... And why do you need to know this? Well because if I'm subscribed to your blog I can't scroll through my subscriptions on my dashboard page (It might be a flash issue or something like that).  So, I haven't been reading like I usually do. I'll catch up once reality comes back and I join the real world again.

Much love you guys,

Monday, November 28, 2011


Holiday commercials of cheer and love
Families hugging, laughing, eating, etc
Joyful children, games, all of it.

I had that.

No longer are the holidays a cherished time for me
More like a slowly turning knife in my heart

Every year I think the next one will be easier...
"Next Christmas will be different..."


I suppose the miracle will come one day... But sadness is surrounding me during this season and I can't seem to shake it.

Too many things stacking the odds.

The little things slip by barely noticed. The big things aren't big enough or miss their mark completely...

Positivity is difficult and feels utterly fruitless.

A tough time in the mind of this complicated lady... A tough time indeed.