Saturday, May 24, 2008

Right vs. Left

Before I begin- let me just say I practically know zilch in the scientific facts department of brains.

OK, I can begin now.

I have owned Guitar Hero III now for a few months, and I have played it well enough to get to hard. I have to practice each song quite a bit before I can play it in career mode with confidence- but needless to say- I can still play it well.

I am, as you can guess, right handed. So this means I "strum" with my right hand and finger the color coordinated "notes" with my left. This particular evening I began on my solo adventure of GHIII (most of the time I play and get anything accomplished, I am playing alone) with the intention of mastering a few new songs on hard.

Unfortunately my pinkie was jamming up on my left hand. I couldn't get it to stop cramping- so this means I was out of luck in progressing. I have to be able to very quickly stamp out "orange notes" if I even dream of playing expert. Sadly, I pulled the guitar strap up and over my head when I had a minipoof of a brainstorm.

"Since my left pinkie is cramping, and I still want to play- I could try and play the lefty way!"

This means I would be fingering with my right hand and strumming with my left. After a brief moment of situating the guitar "comfortably" in the lefty position, I went to practice... on easy.

First song- Slow Ride, as made famous by Foghat.

I missed the first 4 notes.

Then hit a few, then missed more.

Here is why. Obviously it was like playing the game for the first time after watching someone who is really good at it (haha) play.

I was "strumming" with my left thumb but every time the note color changed my whole arm would do this sort of dance wanting to make my fingers move. No! Thumb only, brain! Thumb only! Strum down, strum down, strum down!

OK, I thought I had it after restarting the song and getting a few more notes in before realizing I was picking my right hand up and off the neck every time the note color changed. This is not only a complete waste of energy- it's stupid.

I had to laugh at myself. I had played so much on the right side, my arms and hands would go into muscle memory mode. When I tried to fight them on it playing lefty, I would confuse my brain and miss a ton of notes.

I pushed on. I mean, how awesome would it be to play on both sides?! Ya, I know.

As I really payed attention to my hands and fingers I realized that I missed the majority of notes because my left side was a split second earlier than it should be. The "note" side of your...err... brain... needs to be a split second faster than the notes, and anticipate changes. The "strum" side of your brain has to be dead on beat. Or you lose the note.

Crazy. It's neat to see that the two sides of the brain can function in unison using two completely different methods. Once your brain is trained one way- it's an exciting (or... nerdy?) challenge to teach it other ways.

Science, nature, brains, and awesomeness. What a way to spend a Saturday night.

[I know that this may be too amazing for some of you to understand- thus causing you to think I am some sort of "geek".]

Thursday, May 22, 2008

Goodbye Tree.

It's strange to me that I have been sitting here trying to write about what I saw this afternoon and I can't find the right words.

A tree fell. Right in front of me.

The wind raged all last night, most likely pulverizing all the foliage the entire time. The morning was just as unforgiving and I witnessed the wind's true spirit.

Gosh, it sounds weird but it was one of the most powerful things I have ever witnessed. Like setting me straight- realigning myself.

The morning was as it usually is. Cranky kid, happy kid, cranky mom, happy mom... hyper kid, tired mom, hyper mom, tired kid...

I packed all our goodies for the day of work. Then when I had carried the wagon to the bottom of the stairs I realized juice had spilled all over the wagon. Great.

I ran back upstairs, told Trevor to wait a minute, grabbed more juice, grabbed the kid and headed down the stairs.

Almost the exact moment my right foot planted itself firmly on the ground- I heard it. The soul of the wind building up force. I looked right at the tree as if I knew it was going to fall before it knew. I saw the wind pick the tree up and push it, right toward me and Trevor. We were out of harms way but we were definitely still very close.

I heard the crackling of the trunk splitting...and that's it. The world fell absolutely silent.

It was slow motion- literally. The tree's very top point was falling straight toward me and it felt as though the moment the wind pushed the tree down- it felt terrible about it- so the wind helped the tree fall more gently.

I know it may sound odd. Oh well. This is how it happened.

I heard sound again when Trevor wiggled and started crying. It scared him. Not that I blame him. I blinked and came back to the real world. There was a man standing behind me, and he asked if we were OK. I said yes, and he walked away. Another man from the opposite direction came and took a few pictures. I wish I had my camera. It was surreal.

No big deal, right? No property damage, everyone was OK....

No. Big deal. It happened about 2 hours ago, and I can't stop thinking about it. I can't even do justice to how I felt it. How it happened. Like I witnessed Mother Nature Herself, taking her frustrations out on the tree.

Really, I can't even imagine what I would be thinking about if that didn't happen. I would probably be sitting on the computer playing Insaniquarium or watching The Office on Netflix.

Yet- it DID happen. So here I am. Talking about Mother Nature and her frustrations. Taking it to heart. Realizing that when I take my angst and anger out on others- it doesn't affect just them. It hurts many. This experience has been more of a soul snap then a tree falling. More of an "I'm thankful for my open mind" rather than "I'm glad it didn't fall on the apartment."

If I hadn't gone back upstairs after the juice spilled, I would have missed the whole thing.

I hope at least one of you out there understands how something so "common" can really be a blessing. Something that at first glance would be unfortunate for the tree, but fortunate for property owners- really had a significant impact.

Thank you wind, thank you tree. May you never go underestimated again... at least in my world.

Oh, and when a tree falls in the woods and no one is around- it does not make a sound. Trees fall in silence.

Blonde Moment

I have been wanting to make my tuna salad for sometime now and the ingredients are as follows:

canned tuna
alfredo sauce
black pepper

I have been picking up the ingredients in bits and pieces for about a month, and usually one will run out before the other is picked up...

I went out and bought 5 cans of tuna (more than enough), and then about a week later bought 3 jars of pesto (just to make sure I wouldn't run out before acquiring the remaining ingredients).

Well, this morning I opened the fridge and saw the pesto. In a fit of joy I bounced over to the tuna and opened 3 cans. Oh I was so happy I could finally make my tuna salad.

See the blonde moment yet? Well, because I let my "joy" get in the way of...well... thought processes... I opened 3 cans of tuna in vain. I have no alfredo. I have no garlic. I have no onions.

It figures. Now I HAVE to go to the grocery store. I hate grocery shopping (hence the reason I didn't buy all the ingredients at ONE time...).

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

Just a Day

You know, it is really refreshing to have a "normal" day.

Not terrible, not great- just normal. Laughed, growled, cringed, and smiled.

One of those days where I think about changing my hairstyle, or sit and look at houses for sale on the internet. One of those days where I (actually) don't worry about what the future holds, and I (actually) don't worry about anything.

A day where I come home from work and will fold laundry and not complain about it. A day where I ate just the right amount of food.

It feels nice. It feels really nice.

It's also one of those blogs where I repeat myself a lot and guess what- I don't care, so neither should you.

::hug:: Let's hope it's just a night.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008


In the spirit of motherhood, I experienced some pretty bad guilt last night.

It happens. To all of us moms.

Trevor woke up at about 1am, whining a bit and moving around like crazy. Nathan had just gotten home from work so I wasn't about to go check on Trevor right away (I had to spend a few minutes with him before he disappeared to work again)- he fell back asleep in a couple minutes anyway.

Come 4:30am Trevor wakes up again, this time crying pretty fiercely. I wait a minute or two and go in his room.

Sure enough: FULL diaper. It was bad. I took him in the hallway so I didn't have to turn a big light on but the moment I peeled back the diaper he started wailing. I had to turn a light on.

I reached into the bathroom right next to us, and flipped the switch on. After cracking the door to ease our eyeballs from the blinding light, I went back to work.

He was fighting me every moment, screaming, and doing the "THIS REALLY REALLY FOR REALS HURTS MOMMY..." cry. The worst thing a mom can hear at 4:30am at this point. Nathan got up to help, and by the time I dabbed all the ::ahem:: mess away he was definitely experiencing a terrible rash. Duh.

We had to scramble and pull apart drawers to find our diaper rash cream (how responsible of us- putting it in an obvious place like the medicine cabinet). We had to hold his arms and legs so he would let me put the cream on. I hate that. After the cream was on he calmed down a bit, breathing heavily but definitely relieved. I put his new diaper on and let him lay there for a few minutes. As I looked at him I cried. I felt so, so, so guilty that I didn't get up earlier. Trevor looked at me, a bit confused, and then sat up and put his arms out. I gave him a big hug. After, Nathan and I talked to him, even laughed a bit. After every laugh of his there was a sort of "ehn" noise which rode down my spine straight into my heart like a dagger. What a trooper.

I picked him up and held him in the hallway for a few long minutes. He had his head against my face and I wanted that to last forever (but only if my arms and back would never get tired). Finally Nathan patted Trevor's back and leaned in for a group hug. We held each other for a deep breath then when Daddy let go Trevor popped his head up- eyes 1/8 open with a big closed mouth grin- and looked at me. Just looked at me in this way I can't describe.... other than the fact it was the cutest thing I have ever seen.

I know he doesn't blame me for not catching his mess earlier. I know he loves me no matter what, but it definitely doesn't stop me from wiping away a tear for how terrible I felt.

Monday, May 19, 2008


In my experience- the thing that bothers me the absolute most about ANY company-


It drives me crazy when I have to run around like a beast and get information from EVERYONE when there could have been a text, a post-it, email, or hey- even verbal relay of information.


It also really, really bugs me when things don't get done when they should be. Common sense. Common sense.

I am not, by any means, complaining about anyone in particular. I just can't believe this tripe has happened EVERYWHERE I have worked. I guess that's the real reason I wasn't moved up into leadership positions. I would be considered a Nazi of some sort and people would thusly hate the fact I actually require WORK TO BE DONE! Or I would be a bitch. Gotta love that.

GOOD GRIEF!! I can't wait to have MY OWN BUSINESS!

Alright, with all that off my chest I feel much better.

Someday it shall be done. It will most likely be a dog training business I choose to have, but I think it would be awesome to have a vegetarian cafe.


Someday. Dreams are fun... especially when they end up happening.

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Trevor's first haircut

I cried. It was rough.

We had to cut it though because it's oober hot here, and he was sweatin' a lot more. Plus, it was getting tangly and I was kind of tired of people commenting on my "beautiful girl". Hah.

It's going to take me a few days to get used to it. I definitely cried.